At the end of the day

I often wonder about high achievers, about their never dying or even diminishing motivation, their constant struggle, their over-whelming (for impatients like me) patience, and their highly controlled-disciplined life. My only wonder is, how do they do it? Ofcourse, I am not looking for a traditional answer, the need to perform. I need a deeper analysis to get a satisfactory answer. Next question would, why do they do it?

I have been one of those who perform to prove once, not to maintain. Prove either to myself or somebody or many. Which means, I do almost all that the high-achievers do for a certain period of time, till I achieve it, and then phussssss… the balloon of energy/determination inflates. I don’t see a point in living in the control and freaky phase for too long. That’s why I personally give more importance to love for what you do than doing it for the sake of achieving something. To reach the state of perfection, I believe you need both the ingredients in certain proportion – you need to like what you do, and you need to be an achiever at heart (to carry you forward in those phases when your liking wavers). And if a high-achiever would say, this is exactly what we do, I would be tempted to believe him/her, but I won’t.

There is something missing in the equation. That’s because, I have seen myself, and I have seen many a times I do exactly that. I love doing what I am doing and I don’t rest until I get it all right. Until, I am satisfied about my job. Then there is a feeling of accomplishment, pride, satisfaction when I am done at the end of the day.

But, alas, the feeling dies as quickly as the soup bubble bursts. And then, I wonder. Here you would understand why I think about high achievers. I am sure for them, the feeling lasts.

I think about all those times when the feeling lasted for me. I realise, they were all those times which I spent not alone, but in company of someone. Family, friends, n strangers too in some cases. Three courses in psychology tell me, I probably have a higher need for affiliation then for achievement. It doesn’t tell enough to put out my probing. For it is a rather disturbing finding. No, I m not over ambitious, infact honestly, I don’t know if or not I m ambitious/highly-ambitious. But I know there are somethings in life that I wanna do. And I won’t be happy unless I do them.

The concern here is simple, all those things that I want to do, are meant to be done alone. And so I wonder, if I will give up without doing them/if I will again experience the bubbling satisfaction even if I carry out those activities. Because I realise that at the end of the day, the things of a totally different realm gives me a sound sleep or a sleepless night.

Jeevan ki vidambana..


One thought on “At the end of the day

  1. ye to mere blog ka theme thaa…… first click par maine sonch sayad apna blog opne kar liya……. anyway comments on this article in your mail box .



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