sometimes so much happens in a day or two that we don’t even register the importance of those proceedings, which only later slowly dwell upon us. What all happened in last 2 days:
1) Delhi trip on Diwali got cancelled. which means for the first time I would be away from home on diwali. (I am really senti about celebrating diwali at home with family)
2) My efforts to come up with a diwali celebration in the campus didn’t work out. Junta wasn’t enthusiatic. And I realised there won’t be other great options outside campus of celebrating diwali either, which left me quite sad for myself.
3) I was assigned two presentations for tomorrow on the day (today) which was scheduled to be a 11 hours working day with all stupid irrelevant (for me) presentations of visiting course advisors and other such sessions.
4) I had been at my best behavior, in terms of sincerity, since last 10 days only to end up feeling foolish for being sincere! Really, I am incorrigable as far as sincerity is concerned and any attempts to change that is like wishing for fish to respire in air!
5) My only roommate shifted and I was left alone in a six-seater dormitory without any chances of moving into a vacant double-seater or in another dorm with batchies. I don’t want to invest any more energy in making friends with strangers.
Well, thats the gist of it mostly. Though when I jot it down, it doesn’t seem such a bigadeal! :) Just that suddenly today I felt the pangs of loneliness again. Which were so far not there in this sem! And among all the fears I may have, the one which stands above all, is the fear of feeling lonely! Of course, that doesn’t stop me from wishing at times to be stranded on an island away from all humanity! :P For those who are confused by all this, kindly note, girls are considered to be complex beings! And I use this tag, just like the tag of female being a bad driver! It makes my life simpler.