“Ok, so what do you want me to do?” exasperatedly I asked.
“Have fun! What else?”
What a shallow answer that was.
“Is that what you think is the purpose of our lives?”
“Do you know of any other purpose?”
Yeah. Of course not. There is no freaking purpose of existence at all. We just happen to fill a time period in the evolutionary time scale on earth. I might end up doing something amazingly awesome without as much as a clue whether it would make any difference, positive or negative now or in billions of years to come. Everything one does is wrapped into different time frames.
Taking advantage of my silence it continued: “Yeah so have fun!”
“Why the hell am I even living then? I might as well discontinue this existence right away if it anyways amounts to nothing.”
“Yup. You can.”
Wow. This does not help me at all. Not that I am suicidal or desperate. Without a project at hand that can help me get a jump start in the morning; that can maintain the adrenaline rush through the day; that can keep my mind off these random crazy thoughts, I suffer from these bouts of ‘existential crisis’. I know they will pass. Nonetheless, the question is valid. What is the meaning of life? Are we just looking for reasons to pass time till we die?
“Have a kid. Your perspective will take a U-turn.”
Obviously! That is why I do not have a kid. I do not need another perspective. Obviously if I have the responsibility of giving birth and raising another human being, the question would no longer remain valid. Like any other living being, I would be alive to procreate and keep the species growing.
“Meditate and the answer will come to you.”
That is true. Life is exactly like meditation.
Both consist of an infinite series of games in which one is constantly playing against the mind. Mind is by default lazy, negative, destructive, emotional, and fickle. Every moment, you need to fight that impulse to be able to create, remain positive, and maintain stable and existence.
When there is work in life to keep your mind occupied, it is like meditating with a chant. Easy to keep focus on. Just keep repeating the chant, as if in a trance. Work is like trance. It has a similar effect on life as chanting in meditation; the effect of being ‘high’, inebriated.
The real struggle is when there is no chant, no sound, and no stimulus. No work. No project. Nothing to look forward to. You still need to keep your focus on.
Life is just a mind game. And you must play to win. Every moment of it.